can't sleep

it's 2am and i can't sleep. my head hurts. my eyes hurt. my heart hurts (what?! just kidding). anyway, ive been staring at the ceiling too long, i'm starting to imagine shadows.

thank you for friendster surveys.

How many keys are on your keychain?

- umm.. i don't have keys. hehe.

If you were given a canvas and watercolors, what would you paint?

- i can't paint. but if i could, i'd paint contentment.

What do you regard as the most repulsive form of music?

- repulsive is such a strong word. the only music i don't listen to is heavy metal. but that doesn't mean it's repulsive.

Whose mind, besides your own, would you like to control?

- minsan nga sarili kong utak hindi ko mcontrol e, dagdagan ko pa, goodluck nlng. answer's a secret.

What is the most dangerous occupation?

- hmm.. probably those people making bombs. or fireworks. maling tapon lng ng sigarilyo, wala na.

What is the first thing you do when you get out of bed?

- check my phone. na ang meron lng ay daily quotes from random people. so i just check the time.

What do you consider the greatest threat to mankind?

- hmm.. bystander effect. ay hinde e.. i can't remember the word for it.. ayun! apathy. ehe.

If you could project yourself into the past, where would you go?

- back when everything was simple. childhood. back when a piece of candy can make ur day.

What are you thankful you're not doing right now?

- i'm thankful i'm not being alone.

What is your favorite kind of candy?

- old ones. :) childhood candies. butterball. tarzan. hahaha. tugon kc e. i miss childhood candies. :(

What is your favorite thing about the beach?

- the smell.

If you were invisible, where would you go?

- taiwan. or right now, las pinas.

What is one object in your home that you are embarassed to own?

- erm.. i dont know.. wait, ill go look. syempre nghnap tlga ako, pro wala e. :P

Fill in the blank: When I dance, I look like...

- i'm hearing music different from the one playing. nyahaha.

Who is the one person you wish you'd never met?

- ehe. starts with an s. si secret.

What is your favorite fruit?

- banana. apple. papaya. black grapes. mango.

What is your favorite kind of cookie?

- the old-fashioned chocolate chip. :)

If you were an evil dictator, where would you rule?

- kmsta nmn na dictator ka na nga, evil pa. ayoko mging dictator. prng nkkpgod.

What do you need to get right now at the drug store?

- sleeping pills

What song do you keep hearing over and over again?

- your song - pne d ko alam bkt. prng tuwing bbuksan ko ipod ko, klngn tutugtog sya. kht sa winamp sa computer. gnun din.

What was the happiest age of your life?

- happiest.. my highschool days. 2nd yr-4th yr. and the present.

What is your favorite piece of clothing that you own?

- umm.. underwear? cos i never leave home without them. :P corneheh.

What two words describe your lifestyle?

- simple and complicated (sabi syo complicated e)

If there is a hell, where is it?

- i honestly don't know.

Which ocean creature fascinates you most?

- corals. nakakaaliw cla mgreproduce.

On a scale of 1-10, how religious are you?

- give me the operational definition of "religious". (weh. naalala ko c alampay e. and my expe grpmates. gusto ko lng batiin c kate and enteng, hi sa inyo.)

What historical figure would you most like to have a discussion with?

- madami e. eric fromm, talk to me. scott peck. ayoko kay freud kc bka wla akong maintindihan. at bkt what ung tanong? hindi ba dpat who?

What color looks best on you?

- i don't know.

What is your favorite thing about being sick?

- nothing. i don't get sick often. and when i do, and i'm too sick to go to school, i miss my friends.

What's new?

- nothing. akin nlng un.

Why are you here right now?

- as in right here? i live here.

What commercial do you find most annoying?

- ung commercial ng lucky me. lucky me ba un? ung bagong instant whatever korean noodles. kc ung guy nkkbwisit, isa lng ung cnsbi.

What was your favorite meal growing up?

- caldereta. the one in goldilocks. hanggang ngyon actually. :P pro ngyon kht hindi na dun galing. :P

If you had to spend the rest of your life in one place, where would it be?

-

Fill in the blank; I am so much smarter than...

- animals.

What one person or thing reminds you of the 80s?

- polka dotted headbands. :P

What is college really good for?

- just to say you're going somewhere even if you're actually experiencing moratorium

Where is the most beautiful place you've ever been?

-

What body part aches the most right now?

- eyes

When is the angriest you've ever been?

- hahaha. actually, i dont remember. :P

What do you waste your time doing?

- surfing the net

On a scale of 1-10, how much do you trust people?

- depends on how i see the person. im much more cautious now.

If you were forced to choose your own death, how would you die

- peacefully. as in kung pwede, matutulog lng ako.

On a scale of 1-10, how photogenic are you?

- negative.

What aspect of your personality could use a little work?

- katamaran

What is your greatest addiction?

- sleep and.. making things even if theyre useless.

What issue are you sick of hearing about?

- political ones

If you were a professional wrestler, what would your ring name be?

- hindi ba pwedeng joy lng? ewan. hindi ko nmn pangarap maging wrestler. much less a professional one.

What language would you like to master?

- chinese. hahaha. cos i pity my parents. for chinese people to say that theyre kids can't speak chinese, prng nakakahiya un. mrunong nmn ako e, just not enough to be confident in using it. :P

What is your favorite dish at a Chinese restaurant?

- salted fish fried rice (more expensive version of daing and rice. hahaha!). un lng. sawa na ko sa ibng chinese food. except crabs.

Who would you least likely expect a phone call from?

- from the people who call me? mariel. hahaha. cos she's saving. :)

What is the longest you have ever gone without a shower?

- 3 days ata. :P hahahaha.

What is the saddest movie you have ever seen?

- i dont know. i dont like sad movies. :(

What time do you usually fall asleep?

- hehehe. mga 2-3?

Where is the worst place to be stuck waiting?

- i don't know. probably outside a cubicle? cos that would mean u need to use the bathroom. and that's just torture when u really have to go.

What is the cutest animal on Earth?

- maraming cute e. :( u cant expect me to choose just one. :(

Name one celebrity that has no right being a celebrity?

- erm.. ewan.

What hobby have you always wanted to pick up?

- painting. pero hindi tlga e. hahaha. it's frustrating, really. cos all i can do is put bits and pieces together. i can't make real art. hahaha.

super random thoughts

cockroaches are scary. they can live for days without their heads (how abnormal is that?), they eat anything. i'm getting goosebumps.

*****

sometimes hunches can be a curse. is it possible that they only happen because you think they will? and since u think they will, they become self-fulfilling? ive had enough of hunches.

*****

some people think psychology is over-rated. i think they're frustrated psychologists.

*****

does House have a conscience?

*****

sometimes i want to die, not because of emo reasons. i want to find out what happens after.

*****

i think kids can love the most.

MBTI

eNfp

gut feelings. here we go.

"please keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle at all times"

ready na.

GO!

bring it on.

hitting two birds with one stone

ball of ham. happy.

HALAGA - PnE
Umiiyak ka na naman
Langya talaga , wala ka bang ibang alam
Namumugtong mga mata Kailan pa ba kaya ikaw magsasawa
Sa problema na iyong pinapasan Hatid sayo ng boyfriend mong hindi mo maintindihan
May kwento kang pandrama na naman Parang pang TV na walang katapusan
Hanggang kailan ka bang ganyan
Hindi mo ba alam na walang pupuntahan Ang pagtiyaga mo dyan sa boyfriend mong tanga
Na wala nang ginagawa kundi ang paluhain ka
Sa libu-libong pagkakataon na tayoy nag-kasama Iilang ulit palang kitang nakitang masaya
Naiinis akong isipin na ginaganyan ka nya
Siguro ay hindi niya lang alam ang iyong
Tunay na halaga

Hindi na dapat pag-usapan pa
Napapagod na rin ako sa aking kakasalita
Hindi ka rin naman nakikinig Kahit sobrang pagod na ang aking bibig
Sa mga payo kong di mo pinapansin
Akala mo’y nakikinig di rin naman tatanggapin
Ayoko nang isipin pa
Di ko alam ba’t di mo makayanan na iwanan sya
Ang dami-dami naman diyang iba Wag kang mangangambang baka wala ka nang ibang makita Na lalake na magmamahal sayo At hinding hindi nya sasayangin ang pag-ibig mo

Sa libu-libong pagkakataon na tayoy nag-kasama Iilang ulit palang kitang nakitang masaya
Naiinis akong isipin na ginaganyan ka nya
Siguro ay hindi niya lang alam ang iyong tunay na halaga
Minsan hindi ko maintindihan
Parang ang buhay natin ay napagtitripan
Medyo malabo yata ang mundo
Binabasura ng iba ang siya’ng pinapangarap ko

toink toink

there's no such thing as being numb. only pretending to feel nothing. (Salonga, 2007)

natauhan lng ako e.

BOOM.

walking around eastwood

ang dami kong naisip. mostly about things i'd rather not think about.

you know how when you talk to your friends, you start talking about one thing, then after an hour or so, sobrang layo na ng pinag-uusapan niyo from the topic na inumpisahan niyo?

parang ganun. i ended up trying to find reasons for why i do the things i do. reasons for why i'm here. why even if everything else is pointing the other way, i'm still walking towards you.

i couldn't think of much. i was starting to feel depressed cos my list was short.

buti nlng, i gave up on thinking and just decided to spend my time on something more productive - reading social psy.

"The real reasons people feel the way they do do not go away when people analyze reasons; they just get obscured temporarily by focusing on reasons that are easier to put into words."
- social psy book

this is insane (not to mention unfair)

GUIDANCE AND COUNSELING ACT OF 2004

psychology majors can't have any jobs unless they take an additional 18 units of education in order to get an mba in education and pass the licensure exam.

even a PhD in psych won't do.

so, kamusta naman ang Pilipinas? don't tell me, theyre gonna kick Father Bu out of his job?!

una sa lhat, psy majors were trained to do what guidance counselors do. hello?! may reason naman kung bakit mas kinukuhang guidance counselors ang psy majors kaysa sa mga education majors, majoring in guidance and counseling (im not targeting anyone btw).

unless ure going to med school, being a psy major pretty much amounts to nothing.

bakit hindi nila nakikita kung gano ka-ilogical nito?

psychology majors MAKE the psychological tests, but they are NOT ALLOWED TO ADMINISTER it???

it's like saying someone can own a company but he can't work in it.

tumutula ng kanta

pagod.

hindi pa nagsisimula ang sem.

how much more can i take?





kaya pa.

survey

1. Honestly, how many people have you had strong feelings for?
-- strong? two.

2. Honestly, what color is your underwear?
-- white

3. Honestly, what's on your mind?
-- madami.

4. Honestly, what are you doing right now?
-- answering this, nametag

5. Honestly, who was the last person you said you loved out loud?
--

6. Honestly, have you done something bad today?
-- yeah. hehe. doesn't everyone? unintentional nmn madalas.

7. Honestly, do you watch television?
-- im watching right now.

8. Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now?
-- hmm.. toughie. at the moment, no.

9. Honestly, who makes you happy most of the time?
-- my friends, family, mariel. and of course, Jess.

10. Honestly, who do you want to see this very minute?
-- mariel

11. Honestly, do you have deep secrets?
-- yup

12. Honestly, when is the last time you have been to petsmart?
-- i dont even know the place.

13. Honestly, are you mean?
-- i dont know. i hope not. i can be mean if i want to though.

14. Honestly, where did you copy and paste this from?
-- from Nat

15. Honestly, where would you rather be right now?
-- taiwan

16. Honestly, do you like someone?
-- yup

17. Honestly, what was the last IM you got ?
-- a few minutes ago. kkain dw muna si mariel. hahaha.

18. Honestly, have you gone out of your way to make a new friend?
-- yup

19. Honestly, do you shower?
-- syempre. kmsta nmn kng nde.

20. Honestly, are you desperate?
-- eh? no.

21. Honestly, how old would you say the average age is for people to die?
-- 85+

22. Honestly, ever made anyone cry?
-- yeah. madaming beses.

23. Honestly, did you ever lie to someone you loved?
-- couple of times. and no, i never meant to hurt them.

24. Honestly, when was the last time you REALLY cried your heart out?
-- a few nights back

25. Honestly, do you have a bestfriend?
-- no. close friends.

26. Honestly, when was the last time you hugged or kissed someone?
-- yesterday

27. Honestly, what makes you mad?
-- when others hurt ppl i care about, injustice

28. Honestly, does being with your friends make you happy?
-- of course :)

29. Honestly, do you believe in yourself?
-- sometimes i do, sometimes i dont

30. Honestly, is someone annoying you?
-- nope, thank goodness.

31. Honestly, have you hugged someone of the opposite sex this week?
-- umm.. yeah. c calvs.

32. Honestly, are you a relationship person?
-- yup.

33. Honestly, are you missing someone right now?
-- sobra.