"I could fall in love with you too"

I wasn't able to post this last night cos my mom suddenly sat beside me while she was reading her magazine. Msyado akong paranoid to post this while she's anywhere near me. This is not the time to tell her anything.

Anyway, i was watching the L word last night, season 4 episode 7. and.. not that i have anything against tina and bette getting back together..

BUT..

i like jodi and bette better. :) tina and bette's relationship was good. but they lacked something jodi and bette have.

they have chemistry. :) nakakatuwa sila.

* i watched My Big Love tonight with mc. :) grand mass then dinner then movie. i miss my hs friends. *sigh* i miss highschool.

im legal in all countries! :)

i know it's a day late and stuff. but im sort of having trouble opening my multiply lately. mdyo.. hehe.. nttkot akong buksan sya. yeah, i know, stupid. eh basta. haha. im seriously thinking of moving my blog to livejournal cos of it. haha. anyway..

thanks to my friends for making my birthday really really special. kahit sa up lng kmi ngpunta at nagpakababoy sa fishball, kikiam, isaw at ice cream. :D namiss ko kayo a. salamat din sa surprise. :) be glad to know that you were the 1st people to surprise me. :P hahaha.

kausap ko pa man din c jamie and ven the night before. cnsbi ko pa na nllungkot ako kc d rin kyo ppnta. tpos pinaiyak pa ko ni jamie that morning kc tlgang nfeel ko ung lungkot. then that afternoon... teneeeeeen! complete with penguin party hats, mini cupcakes, a big orange letter and the best people in the world. :D i love you guys. *HUGS*

thanks to everyone who greeted me. :) birthdays are not there to remind you how old you are. they're there to remind you how many years you have been loved. :) i've had 21 years of love, people. :)

may nggreet sa akin na d ko kilala. feeling ko nwrong send kc sbi nya "happy birthday jay!" :P humabol pa sya ng 11:50+. belated happy birthday jay! :)

bawal basahin ng mga makakapal at assuming

i wish i've never fallen inlove so it won't be as ruined to me as it is now.

*****

why can't we just go back to being what we used to be? being good friends? is it really that hard for you?

*****

people say it's easy to be happy. what they won't admit is, it's extremely hard when you really don't feel like it.

*****

whenever you made promises before, i never let myself fully believe any of it. when everything ended, i found that i have little - if any - self-control. i found i believed it all like i didn't know anything about getting hurt.

*****

friends say they'll be there. truth is, it's hard to find friends who'll be there even when it's inconvenient for them.

*****

i wish forgetting was as easy as remembering.

*****

you got too scared again. you promised.

*****

wasn't it your idea, your philospohy? wasn't it you who convinced me? so why does it seem like you've forgotten everything?

*****

i need to cry. pagod na ko tumawa.

*****

i thought we were gonna be okay. you made me believe we were gonna be okay. so where are you now?

*****

madaya ka. ang dami dami mong sinabi. wala kang ginawa kahit isa.

*****

i was brave enough for you. why can't you be brave enough for me?

*****

i need someone to take over my life for me. i give up. i really really give up.

recrystallization

Were we ever?, did we use it up too fast?
Are great moments never meant to last?
And the last thing that I want
Is to ever make your smile go away
Keep the memories take the best of what we had
I can't stand to watch what once was great go bad
And if i can't be with you
Then I'd rather just remember what we knew

When you love someone
And you love them with your heart
And it doesn't disappear if you're apart
When you love someone
And you've done all you can do - you've done all you can
When you set them free
And if that love is true
When you love someone
It will all come back to you

Nights i wondered, was it too much that we gave?
If we'd given more could we have both been saved?
And i guess we have crossed the line
Never knowing what was yours
And what was mine

And through it all, i still have no regrets
Just promise me - promise me
You never will forget - you never will forget
When you love someone
And you have done all you can do
And you set them free and if that love is true
If you love someone, it will all come back to you

change. we don't like it, we fear it.

i was supposed to post this last night. but for some reason, i didn't. i think it's because i wanted time to think about everything.

and after all that thinking, the only thing i can say right now is..

yesterday proved a lot to me.

"Change. We don't like it, we fear it. But we can't stop it from coming. We either adapt to change or we get left behind. It hurts to grow. Anybody who tells you it doesn't, is lying. But here is the truth. Sometimes the more things change, the more they stay the same. And sometimes, sometimes change is good. Sometimes change is everything."
- Meredith Grey

talk about advertising

This is is a story from University of the Philippines (Diliman) about a young college girl who passed away last month.

Her name was Summera. She was hit by a dumper truck. She had a boy friend named Arif. Both of them were true lovers. They always hung on the phone. You could never see her without her cell phone. In fact she also changed her phone from Smart to Globe, so both of them can be on the same network,and save on the cost and get good network coverage. She spent half of the day talking with Arif. Summera's family knew about their relationship. Arif was very close with Summera's family. (Just imagine their love). Before she passed away she always told her friends "If I pass away please bury me with my hand phone" she also said the same thing to her parents.

After her death, people couldn't carry her coffin, I was there. A lot of them tried to do so but still couldn't, everybody including me, had tried to carry the coffin, the result is still the same. Eventually, they called a Feng Shui Master. He took a stick and started speaking to himself slowly. After a few minutes, he said "this girl misses something here". Then her friends told the Master about her intentions to bury her with her phone.He then opened the coffin and places her phone and SIM card inside the casket. After that they tried to carry the coffin. It could be moved and they carried it into the van easily. All of us were shocked. Summera's parents did not inform Arif that Summera had passed away.

After 2 weeks, Arif called Summera,s mom. Arif, "I'm coming home today. Cook something nice for me. Dont tell Summera that I'm coming home today, I wanna surprise her." Her mother replied... "You come home first, I wanna tell you something very important." after he came, they told him the truth about Summera. Arif thought that they were playing a fool. He was laughing and said, "don't try to fool me - tell Summera to come out, i have a gift for her. Please stop this nonsense". Then they showed him her grave. He said... "It's not true. We spoke yesterday. She still calls me. Arif was shaking. Suddenly, his phone rang. "See this is from Summera, see this..." he showed the phone to Summera's family. All of them told him to answer. He talked using the loudspeaker mode. All of them heard his conversation. Loud and clear, no cross lines, no humming. It was theactual voice of Summera; there was no way others could use her SIM card since it was nailed inside the coffin. They were so shocked and asked for the Feng Shui Master's help again. The Master brought his co-masters to solve this matter. He his co-masters worked for 5 hours.Then they discovered one thing...

Globe has the best coverage. Where ever you go, their network follows...

*****

nakakainis lng ung email na to. natawa ako pro super sandali lng. mga 5 seconds. :P

to keep ourselves from boring to death..

we amuse ourselves with ven's planner!

"you saved my life."

"well, you screwed up mine."

saw it during org chem. :) naaliw lng kami knna kc ang emo. bwahaha.
ven's planner = perfect ENTERTAINMENT

these are the things that make org chem and ma'am querebillo bearable. :) hay. i dream of an orgchem-free life.

P.S. look at my headshot, c ven may gawa nyan. :P at ang background, you guessed it! ang bagong gawang daan sa ateneo. at oo, ngpicture kami sa gitna ng maraming taong nagmamadali pumasok sa mga klase nila. :P at kami, pa easy easy lng. haha.

oth nights

sa mga ayaw malaman kng anu nngyri dhl d nyo pa nppnood episode 7, wg nyo na basahin.

Peyton: I was there Lucas. I was so proud of you but we hadn't talked in a long time and I saw you with Lindsey and I figured you guys were together which clearly you are. I like her. I do but do you remember when you first joined the Ravens and you took all my sketches to Thud without even asking and do you remember what you said that night when you first entered the gym?
Lucas: Your art matters. It's what got me here.
Peyton: Yeah, it's like you touched my soul and a few days ago I was ready to quit again but you saved me with the words you wrote about me in your novel. So if your struggling writing the next one you should know that your art matters Lucas. It's what got me here.

too bad Lucas already asked Lindsey to marry him. BOO.

grar. but i believe brooke. lucas and peyton are meant to be together. lucas is just too caught up with the whole "i asked you to marry me and you said no" issue to realize it. grar.

im supposed to be studying orgchem. but whatever. :) paninindigan ko na ang pagiging patapon na studyante hanggang tonight. bukas simula na ang walang tulugan.

waste your time

i've been playing with the idea of deleting my multiply..

i need a drastic change in my life. and.. wla. as if deleting my multiply would be drastic enough?

only problem is, nkakatamad isave isa isa lht ng pics na nndito. syempre dnelete ko na cla sa computer kc iniisip ko "nasa multiply naman".

wele leng. im just disturbing everyone with my unimportant ramblings.

to delete or not to delete.. grar. even simple things wrap themselves in complication.

or maybe i'm really just indecisive?

frustrated

i wanna paint on shoes.

and i want a pet turtle.

and i want to drive.

and i wanna move out. -> okay, sobrang asa na to. rephrase.

i want to experience how it is to live alone. kahit temporary lng. -> sobrang asa prn pro more possible than the previous one.

i want, i want, i want.

ang dami kong gusto.

thinking about things you can't have is fun but definitely frustrating.

STOP THE ABUSE!

Child sexual abuse is an issue that is avoided as much as possible, because it is something that most people cannot bear to talk about. But because we stay quiet, victims continue to live their lives hiding in shame, pain, and fear. Because we tolerate it, children will grow up thinking that this kind of life is what they deserve.

The goal of Tugon's Enough Abuse Campaign is to put an end to this silent epidemic. Through our campaign, we will let the Ateneo community into the minds of those who have been sexually abused. Without sugarcoating their experiences, we will let you into the harsh realities that they have to go through every single day.

From February 11-15, get yourself informed and involved.

• Buy an Enough Abuse wristband for Php 50 from Kostka Extension.
• Visit our exhibit in MVP Basement.
• Go to SOM 210 on Feb. 13 to learn what really goes on in the lives of these girls.

It's time to put an end to the silent epidemic.
It's time to say ENOUGH ABUSE.

Support TUGON's campaign against child sexual abuse.

wheee!

it's the first rose in our garden. :) wheeee!
and yeah, gnyan tlga kulay nya. :)
(sorry sa pic, hindi ako photographer e. :P)

i seriously think..

that i'm getting myself into trouble. as in d lng trouble, kung di..

TROUBLE.

we cue the shots :)

REGCOM is looking for interested incoming JUNIOR and SENIOR applicants.

Sign ups are on February 11 to 16.

Interviews will be held on February 18 to 23, 9:00 am to 5:00 pm at Dela Costa Consultation Room 6.

Walk-in applicants are welcome but will not be prioritized.

Sign up and see more details at the RegCom Board, Kostka Extension, near Libwalk.

mga nasa utak ko habang nag-iintay ng sundo

may gusto akong sabihin pro hindi ko masabi kasi hindi ko alam panu sabihin sa taong un ung gusto kong sabihin.

hindi naman ako galit. hindi rin ako nalulungkot. hindi ako nanghihinayang. hindi ako nagsisisi.

pero nagyon, nakikita ko na kung bakit sinabi sa akin dati na wala nman tong pupuntahan, kasi wala nga nman tlga. hirap kasi sa akin, pagdating sa mga ganung bagay kelangan makita ko for myself, kelangan maexperience ko for myself bago ako maniniwala.

pero tama sila. minsan, kelangan kong matutong bumitaw muna. nang hindi kinakailangang sabihin sa akin ng ibang tao na gusto nilang bumitaw ako. dapat matuto akong umalis kasi kelangan kong umalis. hindi dahil kelangan ng iba, kundi dahil kelangan ko.

sa social psy, may tinatawag na insufficient justification effect. sinasabi lng dyan na minsan, alam nman ng mga tao na wla na tlgang pupuntahan, wla na tlgang pag-asa. pro hindi cla umaalis kc pinaninindigan nila ung effort and time na nabigay na nila. madalas sabihin sa akin noon na guilty ako dyan. ngayon, inaamin ko na. tama kyo, guilty nga ako.

ngayon, steady lng. napagod na rin kc ako kaya hindi na msydong mahirap tanggapin ung nangyari. pro oo, may nawala sa akin. pro ok lng. kapalit kc nun, may nadagdag na isa sa listahan ko ng kaibigan.

you will always mean a lot to me, probably even more than most of my friends. because i shared a big part of myself with you. i gave you everything i could, even more than i thought i could. and i know you gave me what you can. so thanks. :) if you need anything, mgsbi ka lng. if you wanna rant or whatever, you know how to reach me. you know i'm just here. mahal kita dude. :) may vcd's ka pa pla skn, kunin mo na pguwi mo. :P

who wants tikoy?

the chinese new year is coming around again. PLUS, this is my philo homework. seriously.

to ven, kate, samboy, jamie, yumi, sars, reese and lor, expect your tikoy from me soon. :P hahaha. dahil hihingi rin naman kyo sa akin, gawin na natin tong tradisyon. bwahaha. anong flavor gusto niyo? :P

FIRE RABBIT Horoscope
Feb 2, 1927 to Jan 22, 1928
Jan 29, 1987 to Feb 16, 1988

Rabbit people love to play under the moonlight. Quite fanciful, they respond to the power and beauty of nature and are always being pulled one way and the other to examine what they find. They are the luckiest of all twelve signs! But, it's more a result of "the harder I work, the luckier I get" than taking crazy chances. They are cautious, conservative, bright, and have a good head for business. Supremely pleasant to have around, these affectionate, naturally shy peacemakers seldom ever lose their temper. They sometimes appear to be singing the blues because of a natural but short-lived tendency towards despondency. Rabbits always inspire deep admiration and trust.

Ginger Soup and Ginger Noodles are among the keys to good health!!

The Fire Rabbits stand out from the crowd of other Rabbits. You might expect Rabbits to be passive, quiet, and loners. Not so, the Fire Rabbits. These extroverts are leaders of the pack! Fire Rabbits intuitively sense the right way to bring out the best in themselves and other people. They are brave creatures, thirsty for life. Others eagerly follow them because of the promise of adventure and great fun, and they are never disappointed. Visionary explorers, Fire Rabbits inspire others to see beyond the surface. Unlike other Rabbits, Fire Rabbits have the potential to be truly rich. Enormously capable and hardworking, Fire Rabbits can achieve great things others cannot match. Captains in charge of their lives, they experience smooth sailing in their careers. The multifaceted Fire Rabbits experience great versatility in their lives. Their interests can range from Agatha Christie to bungee jumping, from caviar to enchiladas, from snowskiing to Scrabble. Speaking of Scrabble, spell Love: L-O-V-E is very kind to Fire Rabbits. Excellent lovers, they rapturously charm their partners with cozy fireplaces, affectionate hugs, and, most of all, undying support and loyalty.

Famous RABBIT people: Hu Shih, Hu Yao-Bang, Kim Young Sam, Sally Ride, Leonardo Di Caprio, Frank Sinatra, Bob Hope, Arturo Toscanini, Leontyne Price, Clare Boothe Luce, Tiger Woods.

click here for yours.

ica survey

because i feel good tonight.

you used your ID to cheat during chinese before

you bonded with Mang James (d lng ako. pti c yaya kilala ni mang james. at may regalo c mang james from my mom every christmas when i was a kid. hahaha! mang james, bkt kpg bumabalik ako ng ica hindi kita nakikita?)

youve fed the cats in gate five (mga alaga ni ms. militante. sya pla ang corps ng CAT nmin. bagay sa pangalan niya no?)

you wear white socks with mostly colored design and CLAIM its predominantly white.

you fold your sleeves up then ms v (sa hs, ms hech. ngyon, ms shirley na. haha.) gets mad. after that you fold them back up.

youve had a ghost experience in the CR

youve had one experience in school. period.

your jogging pants' seal is either scratched off or being scratched of on purpose.

you collected KISSES in grade 3 or 4 (ung small "beads" na mabango for kids pro kpg inamoy mo ngyon, mrrealize mo na sbrang sakit pla nya sa ilong)

tamagotchis and digivices were awesome. (gradeschool days)

POKEMON CARDS.

youve laughed at those funny cardboard signs in the big burp. (of course. mga bano signs.)

your arm chair's table is broken (not all the time. swerte swerte lng sa seating arrangement)

youve carved random things on the seat infront of yours.

youve written in the CR cubicles with magic marker (and pencil)

you believed the dwende story in kinder and grade one. (ung cla snow white sa tabi ng bahay kubo? utu-uto ako e)

youve fallen off the platform stage thing in the KP area (and to think na hs na ko nun. grar.)

youve taken out the lock on the swings to make them err.. swing. (in my time, the swings were lock-free. nung ngkron ng lock un, 3rd yr na ata ako. hscc na plgi, hindi na swing. :P)

you laughed at the giant host that was bigger than the Priest's head. (what?)

youve made funny nicknames for Lao Shi. (d lng kay Lao Shi.)

youve argued with Lao Shi about Shuo Hua and Writing. (kandak D, kandak D!)

youve ATTEMPTED to count the holes in the DTASC's ceiling.

youve poked holes in the AV room's walls. (they were full of holes to begin with. :P)

youve eaten in Computer class.

you didnt do your work in computer, just browsed the internet and checked multiply. (pro nung ngcomp class kmi, wla pang multiply. so games lng. :P)

youve screamed in Chinese Speech without Lao Shi even noticing.

youve made fun of teachers. (forte to ng mga ican.)

you cant go more than a day without buying coke or C2 during recess (cornbits and sunshine peas :P joanna, cornbits buddy, i miss you!)

you took the One Line policy seriously for 60 seconds. at the most.

youve tried sliding down the rails of the grade 3 staircase. (stupidity at its best)

youve stolen a book from the Library and they didnt care.

youve had more than 3 IDs. (at a time? i've had 2.)

you have texted in class by either A. using your bag. B. you memorize the keys so you keep it in your pocket. or C. in your pencil case or book. (tapos ang ktxt mo lng, seatmate mo. or ung friend mo sa kabilang classroom. :P)

YOU DRAW ON ANNE FRANK's FACE.

youve been caught eating in class. (wala nmn paki ung teacher)

you KNOW everything in school is crappy but overpriced. (yung food)

you went crazy over Choco Mucho and Jungle Juice. (d ko na ata naabutan to..?)

youve colored stuff with correction fluid.

you write on your shoes.

you wear a jacket everyday. (nung 4th yr ako, 2 3rd yr classrooms lng may aircon. the next yr, pti 4th yr aircon na. damn.)

you go to Ash Creek alot.

you sing random mass songs after a Mass.

youve slammed into a door while observing the "one line policy."

you own an ICA jacket. (i want one! :( )

your assignment notebook is either completely blank and dubbed useless or all the pages are torn out and used for doodles. (i stopped buying the assignment ntbk when i was in grade 5 i think. pro oo, nung bumibili pa ako nun, gnyan na gnyan)

your CLE notebook is full of stuff that have no relation to CLE. (may a few CLE related stuff. pro mostly hinde)

you DONT double your Filipino verbs like "LETS MAKE TUSOK TUSOK THE FISH BALLS" or "LETS AKYAT AKYAT THE STAIRS" (kill me now kng ganyan ako magsalita)

youve read Twilight.

you write on the CR mirror with soap.

youve crammed on the day of the test... and passed.

33/50 not bad. :P

i miss my ica days.
...
.....
.......
eww. forget i said that.
i miss my ica friends, rather. :P