LIFE

currently frustrated. reading harry potter.

use your magic and make time go faster, please?

hay.

even harry can't distract me with all his wand-waving.

genovesi

reading theo can make you cynical.

harhar.

wala lang.

erm..

wala lang. i have a lot of explaining to do.

knkabahan na ko. wala pa nga.

kamusta naman.

argh. i hate multiply.

napaisip lang ako

ayoko na mag-isip. marami kasi nddulot ang pag-iisip e. sakit sa ulo, sa puso, sa lahat lahat na. nakakainis na nga minsan. nag-iisip ka kasi may alam ka at may hindi ka alam. ganun din sa pagtatanong.

pero kung alam mo na ung sagot sa itatanong mo, bakit mo pa tatanungin? kasi, hindi ka kontento sa sagot na nkuha mo. may kulang. may nawawala. may gusto ka pang malaman.

gustong gusto kong intindihin lahat. lahat-lahat nang sasabihin at ibibigay sa akin. pero naisip ko, walang kwentang gustuhin na intindihin ang isang bagay, kung hindi niya gustong magpaintindi. wala. walang kwenta. sayang sa pagod. sayang sa hirap. sayang sa oras.

pero pinipilit ko pa rin? bakit?

kasi alam ko, na hindi ko magagawang mahalin ang isang bagay sa lubos ng aking makakaya, kung hindi ko ito naiintindihan.

kaya sana, hyaan mo na akong intindihin ka. magpaintindi ka.

isang malaking GRAR.

im studying for io. anyway..

HELLO CRAMMING. hello F. hello resked. hello to sabog and irresponsible me.

goodbye magis. (as if ever ko plinanong maging magis)

GRAR.

ayheytchu.

*oooh. i cant wait for a week of ranting. venisse and kate, prepare yourselves. i am bound to.. think think THINK. HOOH WELL. whatever.*

here goes.

this one's from nat. :) parang ang saya e.

List 20 things you want to say to people but know you never will. Don't say who they are.

1. ive known you since we were kids and ive never been able to tell you how grateful i am that you're just there. we may not talk or text much, but when we spend time together, it's always like the old days. tyong dalawa. believe it or not, but you know absolutely everything about me. kasi alam ko, no matter what happens, the one thing you will always give me is acceptance. so thanks. :) mahal kita, alam mo na dapat un. :)

2. hello blockmate. (cge, mghulaan kyo kng cnu to. hahaha.) alam mo naman na kahit anong oras, pwede mo ko kausapin. at alam mo rin na kahit busy ako, ill always make time for you. kaya mo bumangon, alam kong alam mo rin yan. and im so proud kasi nakikita kong un nga ang nangyayari ngyon. wg ka mgalala, kpg nahulog ka ulit, sasaluhin kta.

3. sandali plng tyo mgkakilala, pro prng super tagal na. salamat sa lahat ng nkwento mo skn tungkol sa buhay mo. minsan hindi ko alam anu ssbihin ko syo, pro lgi lng nmn ako handa makinig. salamat sa lhat ng tawanan. at ka-emohan. sana makita ktang gumagala-gala minsan sa ateneo. hindi na tyo ngkkta e. :P

4. ikaw, hanggang ngayon, hindi ko prin magawang kausapin ka ng maayos tungkol sa mga nangyari. gusto ko malaman mo na naiintindihan ko. kung bakit ganun ang nangyari. gusto ko malaman mo na okay na ang lahat. sorry kung nasaktan kita in any way. madali lang sumaya kung ggustuhin. so, be happy.

5. wag ka nman masyadong insecure. minsan lng tlga nakakainis na e. at wla akong paki kng alam mo kng cnu ka. kasi gnito tyo. wlang tinatago. lahat cnsbi. kaya nga nakakatuwa e. kasi alam kong kahit na magaway tyo, mgsigawan sa telepono, hindi magpansinan, magsagutan sa ym, we will eventually be okay. at kht hindi ko sabihin, alam kong alam mo na i love you. :P

6. you have seen me at my best and at my worst. at kahit anong mangyri, nndyan ka prin. nakita mo lahat ng kaya kong gawin. and pumalpak man ako, u never stopped believing that, eventually, i can and that i will.

7. wag ka na bumalik dun. dito ka na lang. hahaha. kahit na lgi ko lng pbiro cnsbi, seryoso ako, nmmiss kita. :)

8. hindi na tyo nguusap at hindi na rin kita msydo nkkta, rarely nlng. hindi mo mllman ever but u could have been a lot to me. and im so glad it didn't turn out that way. okay na ko na ganito tyo. okay na ko sa smile and wave lng. goodluck syo. :)

9. may gusto akong sabihin sayo. sobrang tgal na tlga. more than a year ko na gs2 sabihin. pero hindi ko tlga magawa kasi nttakot tlga ako sa mgging reaksyon mo. and kung dumating ung time na nasabi ko na syo, sana hindi ka mglit na inabot ako ng gnun ktgal. :P

10. buhay ka pa ba? kung oo, wag ka na magpakita sa akin kht kelan.

11. ive learned so much from you. cguro hindi mo alam un. pro totoo. i dont how i can ever repay you for every bit of advice uve given me, every word you defined for me (kasi ayaw mong itanong ko sa iba para hindi ako mapahiya :P), every show you asked me to watch just to "show" me "how it is". i know ive made some decisions ure not proud of, mnsan nkkta kong gs2 mo na tlga iuntog ung ulo ko sa dingding. pro kht gnun, lgi ka prn nndyan. >:D< thank you.

12. thanks for listening to me rant and rant about things. and thanks for doing the same when you need to vent. kahit na mga ganap na doctor na tyo (wlang kkontra, libre mangarap), sana hindi un mgbabago.

13. i think i liked you, or maybe even loved you then. and if i did, im pretty sure you knew. but thanks for not making anything out of it. thanks for teaching me to just go and live life. thanks for helping me take risks and assuring me that ill have you to fall back on when i make mistakes. i hope you know you have me too.

14. i once woke up and thought you left us. and alam ko ang sama. pro un tlga naramdaman ko. i didnt care. i hate it when im left alone with you. most of the tym, id rather that u just leave me alone. ewan ko bkt. cguro msydo lng akong naiinis kc when we were kids, uve always been someone distant, someone to be feared. and now that ure trying to "catch up", ewan. frankly, i dont even care if u try anymore. u cant break me.

15. i was a kid. i was in grade 1. and i trusted you. how could you do that? i didn't know any better. tpos nung nagkita tyo, u act as if nothing ever happened. how do u expect me to look at u and see someone respectable after what u did? kahit kelan, hindi ko makakalimutan ung gnwa mo.

16. thanks for trying to understand us. and for protecting us when things go wrong. i know i dont often say it, actually, rarely, pro sana nffeel mo na mahal kita. sana maging okay na ung thyroid thingy mo. i love you.

17. you dont know how much i look up to you. idol kita e. :)

18. i love talking to you and listening to what you have to say. alam ko na i can be all hyper or emo or depressed and ull just bear w/ me anyway. sana alam mo na gnun rin ako syo. :)

19. nakakainis ka. hindi ka na ngkkwento. lapit lapit lng ng bahay mo sa bahay ko e. magparamdam ka nmn dyan. ngpapamiss ka nnman e. grar ka, grar.

20. thanks for being what i need at the moment, all the time. persistence pays off. but you know that. :) i love you. :)

WARNING: cheesy post

WHEN YOU RUN AWAY FROM ME
>>> ill run after you

WHEN YOU POUT YOUR LIPS
>>> ill kiss you

WHEN YOU CALL ME CRAZY
>>> ill say, "you got that right. *smile* crazy in love with you"

WHEN YOU ARE SILENT
>>> ill hold your hand and let you know im here

WHEN YOU IGNORE ME
>>> ill hug you until you notice me

WHEN YOU PULL AWAY
>>> ill pull you closer

WHEN I SEE YOU AT YOUR WORST
>>> ill love you more

WHEN YOU SCREAM AT ME
>>> ill just say "tama na kasi. kahit anong gawin mo, mahal pa rin kita"

IF YOU DONT CALL ME
>>> ill call you

WHILE YOU HOLD MY HANDS
>>> ill hold yours tighter

WHEN YOU TELL ME YOU DID SOMETHING WRONG
>>> ill tell you that it's okay and forgive you

laboooooo

dahil napapagod na ko sa kagagawa ng lab report, hinga muna.

anu ba. anong sabi sakin?

"magalit ka kasi"

ayoko. nakakapagod magalit. pwede namang magmahalan nlng tyong lahat (weh? tulog lang yan, joy).

henako.

bawal maging EMO. balik na nga sa expe.

GRAR.

kahit ang theo, pnproblema ang pagmamahal

Of all the misconceptions about love, the most powerful and pervasive is the belief that "falling in love" is love or at least one of the manifestations of love.

One by one, gradually or suddenly, the ego boundaries snap back into place; gradually or suddenly, they fall out of love. once again they are two separate individuals. At this point they begin either to dissolve the ties of their relationship or to initiate the work of real loving.

.. real love does not have its roots in a feeling of love. To the contrary, real love often occurs in a context in which the feeling of love is lacking..

Falling in love is not an act of will. it is not a conscious choice... We can choose how to respond to the experience of falling in love, but we cannot choose the experience itself.

Falling in love is not an extension of one's limits or boundaries; it is a partial and temporary collapse of them. the extension of one's limits requires effort; falling in love is effortless... When limits are extended or stretched, however, they tend to stay stretched. Real love is a permanently self-enlarging experience. Falling in love is not.

Genuine love, on the other hand, implies commitment and the exercise of wisdom.

genuine love is volitional rather than emotional. The person who truly loves does so because of a decision to love. This person has made a commitment to be loving whether or not the loving feeling is present.

"Love is as love does"

-Scott Peck, The Road Less Travelled

mabuhay ang theo.

just got home

recap of my day.

cog psy
philo
pigged out on choco crunchies
listened to emo music w/ ven
got extremely pissed (alam mo anu ibig sabihin ng PRIVACY? at nang BASTOS?)
som mall
got even more pissed
matteo again
attended io
jollibee
talked to people on the phone
went to glorietta (take note, this is the part where my day suddenly became perfect. *sigh* haaaaay. someone turn back time.. :P )
got home

big girls don't cry

WHATEVER.

72%

from nixie teng. let's see..

How Chinese Are You?

[ ] You like to eat chicken feet. (ok lng pro d ako mhilig)
[ ] You sing karaoke.
[ ] You've worn glasses ever since you were in fifth grade. (HS lng naman :P )
[ ] You'll haggle over something that is not negotiable.
[ ]You are a math genius. (nyahaha. ASA!)

Total: 0


[x] You take showers at night.
[x] You avoid the non-free snacks in hotel rooms. (nung kid ako, i ate the chips once, tpos nglit skn c mama. ever since then, d na. :P)
[x] You say "aiyah!" and "wah!" frequently.
[x] You save grocery bags. (i dont, my mom does)
[x] You twirl your pen around your fingers.

Total: 5


[x] You have been taught that wasting food is a sin.
[x] Your dad thinks he can fix everything himself. -
[ ] You beat eggs with chopsticks. (nung 2nd yr 2nd sem lng kc ako natuto mgchopsticks e.. thanks to enteng :D )
[x] You like congee with thousand-year-old eggs. :)
[x] You have eaten moon cakes. (yummy!!!)

Total: 4


[x] If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask you if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.
[x] You email/msn your friends, even though you're only 10 feet apart.
[x] You can read traditional Chinese. (a bit. cguro mga hlaf a sentence kng common ung characters. HAHAHA. hail to chinese education in ica.)
[x] Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin before they are thrown away. (ako kmkuha ng bago, so ngeend up na may 2 tubes ng toothpaste sa banyo. tpos mgglit c mama. :P pasaway e.)
[x] You know what pearl milk teas are.

Total: 5


[x] You bring fruit with you as a gift when you visit people's homes. (not really fruit. but my mom says you should at least bring something, preferrably food. para daw hindi na cla mhihirapang mghanda ng pagkaing ihahanda syo.. kainin ko nlng kya ung ibibigay ko bgo ko pa ibigay kng gnun..?)
[x] You have acquired a taste for bitter melon.
[x] You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table.
[x] Your parents argue with other adults over the dinner bill.
[ ] You love to use coupons. (what coupons?)

Total: 4

Now add the numbers up and multiply it by 4.
(18 x 4 = 72% CHINESE)

GRAR

you had no right to say that.

nakakainis ka.